Sunday, September 8, 2013

Sorry, this is a long one....

I am sure most of you have heard me say that I grew up in a home where the TV was on from the time I woke up in the morning (if Dad had turned it on to watch the news as he ate breakfast) until 2:00 in the morning or whenever my mom finally went to bed.  (It was even on during dinner time – even if we were eating in the other room.)
My mother was an only child and she grew up with the radio as her companion. When mom and dad got a TV it eventually took the place of the radio for noise and companionship when she was alone – and then, even when she wasn't  When we would go their house when the older kids were little the TV would stay on the whole time. (Ugh! I hated that!) 
So, I brought a lot of bad habits to my adult life. You Dad was gone most nights and the TV was my company. Hopefully, you also remember that I tried and succeeded at times in establishing TV off times. On one hand I would have loved to have been a TV-less family. On the other hand, I realize there are good things that you can watch on TV.
Anyway, so you have probably all developed some bad habits from my poor example. I apologize for this.  I have learned some discipline but I still have a long way to go. I hope you will consider the following and look to see if you need to make any changes in your life.
This is something I think about often so I am glad I have this opportunity to teach you. I am not out to offend or condemn anyone. I just want you to ponder and let the Spirit guide you…
In the August 2013 Ensign there was an article by Elder Patrick Kearon “Opening our Hearts to Revelation” which brought this topic to the forefront of my mind again. He said,
“In fact, it is often because we are so busy receiving other messages that we impair our ability to receive the much-needed messages from our eternal home. We live in a world in which messages surround us, even bombard us. Our smartphones, our computers, and our tablets are constantly buzzing, beeping, and vibrating with every new text, social media update, email, and photograph. It really is instant and insistent messaging.
We must be selective in the messages we choose to receive. It is vital to our spiritual well-being that we not consume so much of our time receiving good messages that we make ourselves unavailable to receive the best messages.   (See Dallin H. Oaks “Good, Better, Best”   Nov. 2007 Ensign)

As with so much in life, what we consume is a choice, so if you spend much of your time consuming one kind of message, don’t be surprised that you become influenced by it. Spending too much of our time with social media, celebrity or entertainment news, games, and the pursuit of online, time-hungry activities constitutes a poor digital diet. When we choose to consume the attitudes and opinions of the mass media, we find our own values and viewpoints following suit. We tell ourselves we’re not being affected by these messages, but that is not possible.

Elder David A. Bednar of the Quorum of the Twelve Apostles posed these questions:
“1. Does the use of various technologies and media invite or impede the constant companionship of the Holy Ghost in your life?
“2. Does the time you spend using various technologies and media enlarge or restrict your capacity to live, to love, and to serve in meaningful ways?”

We need to be aware that many of today’s messages in the media can cause us to doubt our faith, compromise our convictions, and view the world through cynical eyes. But we can deflect deceptive messages with our faith intact if we are connected in a vibrant, continuous stream to the source of truth and light. If we have questions or doubts, we get answers from Heavenly Father through the delicate and precious channels of revelation that operate when we remove all barriers to our hearts. We choose to “look to God and live” (Alma 37:47).”  (Bold and italics added by mom.)
Ok, mom here again. I know I need to do better. I need to leave the TV off more. I would invite you to examine your TV watching. Does it follow what Dad and I tried to teach you. Is it virtuous, lovely, of good report and praiseworthy? Did you notice that funny was not included in their by the prophet? I know it is hard to turn off a show that makes you laugh but if they are degrading sacred things – like chastity and morality – is it really worth it? If it is dark and shows the darker side of life is it worth filling your mind up with that darkness?  I will let you decide. I think you know the right answers.
Finally, when I was raising you children I read many books on child rearing, talked to other moms young and old and read parenting magazines. Sadly, I don’t recommend any parenting magazines now – except for the Ensign. J  But I did Google children and media and found the following which was corroborated over and over again in other articles I found. It is what I have read over the years. I leave it with you for your discernment.
I love you!!! - Mom
Most kids plug into the world of television long before they enter school. According to the Kaiser Family Foundation (KFF):
·         two-thirds of infants and toddlers watch a screen an average of 2 hours a day
·         kids under age 6 watch an average of about 2 hours of screen media a day, primarily TV and videos or DVDs
·         kids and teens 8 to 18 years spend nearly 4 hours a day in front of a TV screen and almost 2 additional hours on the computer (outside of schoolwork) and playing video games

The American Academy of Pediatrics (AAP) recommends that kids under 2 years old not watch any TV and that those older than 2 watch no more than 1 to 2 hours a day of quality programming.
The first 2 years of life are considered a critical time for brain development. TV and other electronic media can get in the way of exploring, playing, and interacting with parents and others, which encourages learning and healthy physical and social development.
As kids get older, too much screen time can interfere with activities such as being physically active, reading, doing homework, playing with friends, and spending time with family.
Of course, TV in moderation can be a good thing: Preschoolers can get help learning the alphabet on public television, grade schoolers can learn about wildlife on nature shows, and parents can keep up with current events on the evening news. No doubt about it — TV can be an excellent educator and entertainer.
But despite its advantages, too much television can be detrimental:
·         Children who consistently spend more than 4 hours per day watching TV are more likely to be overweight.
·         Kids who view violent acts are more likely to show aggressive behavior but also fear that the world is scary and that something bad will happen to them.
Children's advocates are divided when it comes to solutions. Although many urge for more hours per week of educational programming, others assert that zero TV is the best solution. And some say it's better for parents to control the use of TV and to teach kids that it's for occasional entertainment, not for constant escapism.
That's why it's so important for you to monitor the content of TV programming and set viewing limits to ensure that your kids don't spend too much time parked in front of the TV.


Sunday, September 1, 2013

Follow the Prophet :)



At a CES devotional back in May, Elder William Walker used President Monson as an example of how to live our lives.
I think it is good advise and we would all be better people if we not only heeded Elder walker's counsel but followed the example of President Monson.

Here are 5 ways he said we could follow him:

1. Be positive and happy.
                  I am not sure this is a natural state for some of our clan. So we need to make an extra effort and
                  perhaps it could evolve into being a part of our DNA.

2. Be kind and loving toward children.
                  I hope this goes with out saying. Your children, any children. I hope you know that I have a
                  soft spot for children. Children are innocent and deserve our concern for their physical,                                 emotional and spiritual welfare.

3. Following the promptings of the Spirit.
                  Pray to receive promptings and then ALWAYS follow them.

4. Love the temple.
                  Go as often as you can. Make it a priority.

5. Be kind, considerate, and love others.
                     I hope I taught you this. Be kind. Be considerate of others. Look for the best in others. Pray
                     to have your heart filled with love for others.













Tuesday, July 30, 2013

Fasting

Hello my children,

Ok, here is one thing I feel like I failed in teaching you - the proper way to fast.

Part of it was that for about 18 years while you were growing up I was either pregnant or nursing so I couldn't fast.

I also didn't believe in forcing you to fast but I wonder if there was another way to encourage it...Hopefully, you will find a better way to teach your children this principle. One way, is to find a common purpose to fast for. I don't think you can ever run out of those.

Most of you were not aware of this but I remember when we lived in Fontana and I would be pregnant or nursing and wish I could fast. At those times I would eat the minimum I could and I would not eat any treats so that I at least had an attitude of fasting.

Today, I can fast and I still struggle with it when it comes to Fast Sunday unless I have a concern I am fasting for. Part of this is changing my Saturday evenings. (I also need to not make salty Saturday dinners which I feel like I alsways do the night before Fast Sunday!)  

A proper fast means going without two meals. That means I should start it Saturday after dinner - with a prayer. But usually I will be eating popcorn or ice cream late that night. Then we come home from church and people start eating and well... The fast should continue until you sit down to dinner.

My counsel to you would be to study the principle of fasting, get a testimony of it and make a proper fast a regular part of your life. I know it will bring strength into your lives and the lives of those you fast for.
There is always someone or something to fast for. Begin and end with a sincere prayer. Pray throughout your fast. Study the scriptures. Ponder. You will be hungry. You may have a headache. Think about the Savior's suffering for you. You can do this  and you will draw closer to Him.

I am sorry if I failed to teach you this important principle. I hope if you haven't you will now learn to do it on your own and make it meaningful in your life.

I love you!

Mom


Sunday, July 28, 2013

Various thoughts to ponder

Here are some notes from speakers I have heard at various conferences in the last year or so....

Sister Bednar - Do the simple things we are asked to do by the Spirit - don't wait for a harder or loftier answer.

Sister Lita Giddens (from our stake conference) - on standing in holy places - "Sometimes a holy place may be a place of uncertainty but we move forward in faith. The scriptures say "I come quickly" this doesn't just refer to the 2nd Coming. He will come to us quickly when we stand in holy places.

Brother Richard Hawks - God's word in the immunization for the ills of the world.

Elder Oaks - At Christmas, don't just celebrate His birthday, celebrate His mission, too.
                     Faith is the Lord is trust in the Lord.
                     If we trust in the Lord we must also trust in His timing.
                     We may not be able to change the challenge but we can change how we get through it.
                     What we hear from the Spirit is more important than what was said by the speaker.

Pres. Samuelson - Do the best we can and the the Lord make up the difference.
                             Find joy as you struggle.
                       

Sister Virginia Pearce - Keep it small. Keep it simple. Give it time.

Sister Barbara Thompson - Where there is faith there are miracles.

“Tell the sisters to go forth and discharge their duties in humility and faithfulness and the Spirit of God will rest upon them, and they will be blest in their labors. Let them seek for wisdom instead of power and they will have all the power they have wisdom to exercise!!"  - Eliza R. Snow


Pres. Uchtdorf -  During seasons when growing conditions are not ideal, trees slow down their growth and devote their energy to the basic elements necessary for survival...Therefore, it is good advice to slow down a little, steady the course, and focus on the essentials when experiencing adverse conditions.



I am not sure who these notes are from...but still good things to ponder...

We should always be learning what errand we should be on...errands require labor and are hard and require diligence.
Where do you hear the voice of the Lord? Go there often...
Make your to-do list - then see if the Lord agrees and approves of it.
Always work to improve your family relationships.


Enough for now!

I love you!!!

Mom





Holiness



Hello my children,

Yes, it is me again but I really want to get rid of some these notes...so I will keep posting.

I am pretty sure I didn't teach you enough when you were little about Holiness. If you were little now I would. It is something I have learned a lot more about the last 15 years or so.

In fact, I bought a book several years ago titled, "The Holiness of Everyday Life" by Joan MacDonald. You may borrow it, if you are ever interested. It is one of those books that is life enriching if not changing. If I could only keep 10 books - it would be one I would keep. I believe I bought it for several friends after I read it because I loved it so much.

Anyway, I learned much from it. I also just ran across some notes I wrote - I am not sure from where. But here they are...

* Holiness requires effort.

* Holiness is a choice.

* Holiness is not boring.

* The temple gives us courage to take the risks of holiness. (That is something to ponder, isn't it!)

The Lord tells us to be holy - yet we resist.

To sanctify means to make holy. I think about this each week when I hear the sacrament prayers. "To bless and sanctify this bread to those who partake of it".  To bless and make holy this bread to those who partake of it. Is it holy to me? When I think about this it makes taking the sacrament more meaningful to me.

Anyway, I hope we will all strive for more holiness in our lives.

Love ya!

Mom

What I wanted to teach you....

                                                                                                                                              July 28, 2013

Hello my children,

There were so many things I wanted to teach you when you were growing up. Some things I did teach you by word and deed. Some things I may have not taught well. Some things I may have totally missed. I apologize for those things.

I had lists of things to teach (I am the daughter of "The Girl of 100 Lists" - an 80's song by the Go-Go's that Aunt Dee used to refer to Grandma Wanlass...) Anyway, the LESSON here is to not be so busy making lists (although I believe lists are good) and keeping them neat in a notebook that you don't do what is on the list!

That being said...here are things I meant to teach you:

* To work - and to work hard - and happily - and that work is good.

* To live within your means. Good grief, if I didn't teach this by word I hope your father and I taught this by example!

* To avoid debt.

* To value learning. (If you missed this one I think it is your fault. I know we have taught this by word and deed. :) )

* Be prepared - for anything and everything. It brings peace.

Just a few things for now...

Love ya!

Mom


To my children

                                                                                                                            July 28, 2013
Hello my children,

I have created this new blog just for you. I feel a need and a desire to still teach you and share with you things I learn. I hope maybe this blog will fill the need I still feel to teach you and hopefully, meet some of your needs also. We will see if it works.

The address for the blog is notfinishedteaching. That is how I feel. The older I get, I realize things I didn't teach you. (I am so sorry!) I also learn new insights and ideas and want to share them. I figure this way you can read what you want and ignore what you want. (Please don't ignore!)

I love you each so much and think about you in everything I do. I am always writing down things to share with you. Maybe this will also get rid of some of my paper clutter. :)

Please know I love you and it has been my greatest honor and privilege to be your mother and to try to teach you the important things in life.

All my love,

Mom